Saying Goodbye

Nov 3, 2011 by

Saying Goodbye

I met an old friend of mine today and we got to talking about Saying Goodbye.  Actually we were talking about Seth Godin’s book ‘The Dip“. The good thing about old friends is that you pick up conversations where you left off.  And we’ve had deep interesting discussions about so many things, including “What’s Next.”  And that lead to a discussion about when to leave “What’s Now.”

That’s a tough one.  No one wants to lose, or fail, or stop trying.  No one wants to say: “it’s over.”  But as Seth Godin talks about, quiting, leaving, failing, saying goodbye is not just a good thing, it’s a necessary thing to get you over “What’s Now” and on to “What’s Next” (see my post on “Who are you?“)

So when do you say goodbye? When is the struggle just a dip vs. when are you on the path to cratering?  That’s the real question, because the dip looks just like a crater right before you get to it. So when is it darkest just before the dawn and you should just stay up, hold on, and fall in love with the sunrise about to happen?

I think it’s a discussion of end points vs. process.  You won’t know that’s on the other side when you have to make a decision.  You won’t know if: the business would have been great, the boy/girl would have been the love of your life, the trip would have changed your perceptions of the world.  You only know what you’re experiencing right now.

So when is it time to “Say Goodbye”?

You say goodbye when “the story no longer rings true“.

Read that again.  It’s important.  It doesn’t matter what the future holds.  But when you no longer believe that

* the idea matters

* you’re still in love

* that path is breathtaking

When you no longer believe it, when the story is no longer true, it’s time to “Say Goodbye”.  And you say goodbye without regards to how amazing or terrible things might be in the future.

So here’s my question: “What are you doing right now that you no longer believe in?”  Anything?  Nothing? Is it an activity? A pretend dream? A person? Have you asked yourself that question lately? That’s the real trick … having the internal strength to really, really ask the question.

It’s tough to take a hard look and clean out your drawers.  But if you do you might just find some space to go from “What’s Now” to “What’s Next”.

See you on the wire

— Steven Cardinale

Related Posts

Share This

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *